Laugh All You Want
by ruined pride
Summary: Dying and being reborn was unlikely. Reincarnating into an anime? Highly impossible. But what took the cake was the fact that a human body wasn't always guaranteed in another life. Whatever entity that did this must be laughing its butt off now. SI OC (Rated T for language)
1. It's All Her Fault

Shingeki no Kyojin/Attack on Titan is one of my favorite anime. And I was inspired by 'Messed Rebirth' by Huntress of Eclipse.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin.**

* * *

Death was unavoidable. That was something that everyone knew, but still found hard to accept. A split second was all it took and death would have come and gone. The way I died was rather... anticlimactic. I had just stepped onto the road when a speeding car rushed towards me.

_BANG_

And I was dead. No screams, flashbacks or last wishes. Somehow, I didn't even feel worried. A brief sting of pain and it was over.

_Well, looks like my room won't need cleaning after all._

* * *

I drifted in the darkness, unable to see or hear anything. If this was the afterlife, I wanted a refund. As I was considering asking for whoever was in charge, there was a tap on my shoulder. I whipped around amd came face to face with a smiling woman.

"God? You're a woman?" were the first words that escaped my mouth. The lady's smile widened, if that was even possible, and she wordlessly reached out and bitchslapped me.

"WHAT THE FUCK, LADY?"

The bitch looked at me and spoke with an annoyed tone. "Why does everyone assume I'm God? Boss just stays in the damn office. And a soul has no gender. I'm here to 'guide spirits into their next life' or something. So hurry up and follow."

I rubbed my stinging cheek and walked behind the spirit. It stopped suddenly and looked back. "Y'know, if ya don't walk fast enough, I'm leaving you behind."

What kind of fucking guide was this? I quickened my pace as we walked on a seemingly endless path. A heavy silence fell between us. After a while, It turned abruptly and pushed me hard enough for me to lose my balance. As I stumbled back into a hole that had opened behind me, It waved at me and grinned, "Enjoy your new life."

At this moment, a very suitable word to describe my situation came to mind.

**Fuck.**

* * *

'What. The. Hell.' I came to, lying on the ground. In a freaking forest. The trees were quite big, and whatever sunlight that had filtered through barely cast any light on the grassy forest ground. I stood up slowly, and looked around. No signs of life.

"Wait a minute, what did that crazy shit say about my new life?" I looked down and freaked out. A piercing scream reverberated through the air. After I slapped, pinched and even hit my head on a few trees, it was confirmed that I wasn't dreaming. 'Ok, ok. Relax, girl. First things first, check if its really true.'

I made my way towards a tree and proceeded to climb it. Reaching the top of the tree, I surveyed the area below.

Sure enough, giants were stumbling around. In the far distance, the shape of a huge rock wall could be seen. One more thing to check. I leapt from the top and fell down. Upon reaching the bottom, I lifted my hand to my mouth before biting down hard enough to draw blood and pulled back. I felt no pain. The flesh I tore off had been spat out, and I watched with growing fascination as my hand began to regenerate. I paled as I realised what that meant.

Giants roaming the land? Check. Harmed without feeling pain and insanely quick regeneration? Check. Big-ass Wall in the middle of nowhere? Freakin' check. Naked with no genitals? ...check.

Memories of an anime I had been watching before I died flooded my mind. Goddammit, that sadistic bitch up there must hate me. I was reborn into Shingeki no Kyojin. As a Titan. I don't know what shit I did to deserve this, but one thing was made clear. Life could be such a bitch sometimes.

* * *

First fanfic here. Please tell me if there's anything wrong.

~Pride


	2. The Legion of (Girl) Scouts

5 reviews! That's a start. Thank you **Spockify**, **Tiger Lily Burning Bright**, **AlltheAces**, **Nina** and **Guest**.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin**

* * *

I was a Titan. Of all the things I could be reborn as, I just had to have the worst luck and land in a Titan's body. I must have kicked too many puppies in a past life or something. I scanned my new body and looked away immediately. This body, for I still could not think of it as mine, was short and grossly overweight. The exact opposite of my old body. Sure, compared to a human I was quite tall, but in Titan standards, I probably only reached up to an average Titan's neck. Height was not a problem when compared to my weight. I was like the overweight fat lady on a weight-loss commercial. Except for the fact that I would probably stay fat despite eating a cow's weight in pills. Could Titans even lose weight? Or would that regenerate back as well?

Wait. If my body was so unhealthy, what about my face? Call me vain, but I was a self-conscious teenage girl in a body that could make a model throw up. It was totally acceptable to be worrying about my face. Now, where was the magic puddle that would appear concidentally?

* * *

Of course, Life just loved to fuck with me. I literally knocked a Titan while looking around. A cute midget Titan. It squealed(?) as it fell over and tried to get back up before falling back like an overturned turtle. Like the helpful passer-by I was, I laughed my ass off as it wriggled around on the ground. It shot me what looked like a glare as it continued to thrash helplessly on the ground.

Let me tell you, having a Titan look you in the eye and glare at you was actually kind of scary. Even one coming from a midget Titan. Those things could leap at you and proceed to chew off your face or something. Like fleas. Hold on, I was going off track. The flea Titan, who I named Mr. Pudgy, had finally managed to roll over and stand up. It looked at me once more before stalking off.

I just waved as it left, giggling slightly. Now, to find that damn puddle.

* * *

Puddles are sneaky little shits. When I actually needed one, those damn things were nowhere to be found. Giving up, I cursed. "Damn it, life so fucking hates me!"

It came out more like, "RAWR RAWR GRUNT SNORT RAWR."

Really, Life, really? Or was it the Bitch Way Up There? BWUT. Not only was I extremely unappealing to the eye, I couldn't even speak properly. Re-learning how to speak was going to be hard. Oh well, bigger problems at hand now. I was trying to find my way out of this forest. No, I was not lost. Just a bit …confused.

Okay, instincts, time to kick in and help.

I turned left and walked.

_ONE HOUR LATER_

Pretty birdie. Funny branch. Cute bush. Flattened grass. Oh, this place did look familiar. So much like where I had started walking. So familiar. Who was I kidding, this was where I had started.

My useless instincts could go and die in a hole now. I admit it, I was lost. Time to use my last resort.

'CHARGE, BITCHES!' That's right. I ran in a straight line, avoiding trees like a bo-

_WHACK_

Fine, screw that. I ran and ran, not even feeling tired. A perk of being a Titan, I suppose. Eventually, there had to be a way out. Well, I was right. Praise the gods for woman's intuition.

Somehow, I had run out of the forest and came face to hard object with the wall. Literally. I had charged straight into the wall and smashed my face in. The Titan body made it painless, but I knew I looked stupid as hell. Cursing furiously, I was sure the BWUT was laughing at me right now. Damn it, karma, of all the times to come and bite me in the ass!

I shakily pulled myself up and gazed at the wall with awe. It was bigger in real life. So this was Wall Maria. The sign hanging at the top of the wall made it pretty obvious. The Shingeki no Kyojin fangirl in me was squealing and having a fangasm at the sight. Making contact with the wall had been achieved, judging by the slight dent left in that part of the wall from my earlier make-out session with it.

Observing the wall, I noted the numerous Titans around me trying to scale it. Stupid Titans, only the Colossal Titan could reach the top. The Colossal Titan. Fall of Shiganshina. The Armoured Titan. Wall Maria's collapse. That shouldn't have happened yet, if the lack of screams and destruction was present. So, where the heck was I in the timeline?

Then, out of the corner of my eyes, I noted a group of people leaving the wall. Turning, I moved closer slowly and observed their green clothes, horses and of course, 3DMGs. The Scouting Legion.

A Titan had found them and they ran into the forest with the Titan behind. One of them, a young man, leapt off his horse and fired the grappling hooks, swinging to the top of the trees in an instant. I watched, transfixed, as he drew his swords and dived down, slashing at the nape of the Titan's neck. It collapsed instantly, the corpse already decomposing. The man sheathed his blades and landed back on his horse, rejoining the group.

That. Was. Awesome. I need to get me one of those. And so, I waited for the Scouts. Hehe, Scouts. An image of Erwin and the rest of Scouting Legion singing 'Everywhere We Go' as they charged and killed Titans emerged. I burst out laughing immediately. Picturing Levi and his squad sitting around a campfire telling horror stories and roasting marshmallows. My stomach began to hurt from the laughter. Even worse, I remembered my neighbor's girl scout activities. Erwin, Levi, Hanji and Mikasa in Girl Scout uniforms, knocking on doors and selling cookies. I was pretty much lying on the ground clutching my stomach and pounding my fist as I almost died from the laughing.

_Maybe being reborn wasn't so bad after all._

* * *

Chapter 2 is up.

Drop a review, please.

~Pride


	3. My Reflection

16 reviews, 9 follows and 9 favorites! I appreciate the support. Thanks to **TenraiTsukiyomi**, **Spockify**, **Niian**, **MasaYumm**, **Mark-Kris Robin**,** IDontReview**, **Atsirk Enoh**, **1827alouette6927**, **tsaurn**, **Harry Abott**, **AnjuAddams, Codebreakeryuuki **and** Nina.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Shingeki no Kyojin**

* * *

After my little laughing spasm, I decided to walk around and find out where Shiganshina was. What? You thought I was going to head into the forest and follow the Scouts? No way. I was a fangirl, not a lunatic. If I was stupid enough to follow the Legion into a forest, where 3DMG could be used freely, I think I would be pretty much dead before I could say, 'douchebag'.

Yep, no forest for me. Strolling around the wall, I noticed a section protuding out of it ahead. Shiganshina. I jogged over to it, inspecting the place. I wonder, how would the inside look like. Ah, if only I was tall like the Colossal Titan. Well, the wall looked pretty fine to me. It was actually longer and wider than I expected. As usual, Titans were trying to scale the wall. Time to try something out. I moved over next to a shorter Titan, pushing it roughly to the side. It grunted at me before staying where it was. I walked to another Titan, shoving it away again. It bared its teeth before pounding on the wall, ignoring me. Who knew Titans were such pushovers?

* * *

I made my way back to where the Scouting Legion had left the walls. Crouching down for a better look, a wooden gate met my eyes. Wood? I pushed on it with two fingers. Upon hearing the wood creak loudly, I quickly withdrew my fingers and stepped back, not wanting to alert the people inside.

I put a distance between the gate and I when the clopping noise of hooves hitting ground reached my ears. The Scouting Legion had returned. I noticed their numbers had dropped, with only about 13 people left, as compared to the earlier 27 who had left. After they entered the walls, I rushed to the forest, hoping to find a survivor.

Immediately, I spotted a half-eaten corpse on the ground. Turning, a pair of Titans feasting on three very dead bodies met my eyes. I was slightly horrified. Watching gory scenes on screen and in real life was very different. Somehow, my body managed to keep going on its own.

Moving on, a damaged 3DMG lay at the roots of a tree. Its owner was nowhere in sight, most likely eaten. Picking up the device, I inspected it carefully. The gear looked perfectly alright, if not for the big dent and hole in the left gas tank. Small bloodstains marred the otherwise stainless steel and I held it up to eye level. A pair of dark onyx eyes met mine. Watching my reflection, I blinked. The eyes copied my movements. Onyx? Hadn't my eyes been blue? I remembered, this was not my body. Quickly unsheathing one of the blades, I adjusted it to reflect my face. It was …average. Not as terrible as I thought it would be. I mean, my body was bad enough. An ugly face would just be the cherry on top. Lucky me.

I had a pair of black eyes. It would have been quite unusual, but after finding out I died and had a Titan's body, nothing short of the Apocalypse would surprise me anymore. My short hair was dark red. It ended right below my ears. Just like how it had been last time. At least something remained the same. Full, pale lips covered my sharper than average teeth. My lips were pulled into a slight smile, with the added effect of half-closed eyes, it looked like I had just woken up from a good dream. It was startlingly normal.

A sharp cry brought me out of my musings. Right, survivors. Ditching the 3DMG, I ran towards the location of the cries. A Titan was gnawing on the lower half of a corpse while gripping a struggling man in its other man was thrashing around furiously, trying to pry the Titan's fingers open. As I neared the Titan, the man whipped his head to look at me with eyes filled with fear and horror, which quickly changed into renewed anger and determination. He started swearing at us. "YOU FUCKING TITANS WILL DIE! EVEN IF YOU EAT ME, I'LL FUCKING COME BACK TO HAUNT YOUR SHITTY ASSES! YOU HEAR ME, RETARDS? FUCKING BRAINLESS PIECES OF SHIT! HUMANITY WILL ALWAYS SURVIVE!"

Wow. He was actually fighting back. I quickly dashed behind the Titan and the soon-to-be devoured human. I launched myself onto the back of the taller Titan, grabbing onto its skull before biting down on the nape of its neck, tearing off most of the flesh as I drew back. A strangled groan left its mouth as it fell forwards, almost smashing the man when it hit the ground. The guy was looking at me as if he had seen an angel. Then again, I had saved him from being eaten.

Reaching out to pluck the man from the decomposing hand, he began writhing around madly as soon as he had been held and lifted off the ground. "Let me go, dammit!"

I brought him up to my chin and released him. Cupping him with both my hands, I scrutinised his body. Not in that way, pervs. He stopped shouting and looked at me. A mutual staring competition began between us. He blinked first. I instantly grinned in victory as he frowned at me. I noticed he was missing a part of his leg from beginning from the top of his shin. How he was able to even move so much with the blood loss astounded me. Sadly, he would probably die in a while. I could not risk returning him or I would be exposed and targeted. I shivered as I recalled Hanji and her weird hobbies. Even in the body of another creature, I still retained the selfish thoughts of a human.

The man snapped me out of my depressing thoughts with a shout. "HEY! I asked you a damn question!"

I placed him on the palm of one hand and gave him a curious look, mentally asking him to repeat it. As if understanding my thoughts, he repeated the question. "I said, do you understand me?"

Nodding, I watched as his facial expression changed from shocked and confused to happiness, before becoming curious, all within the span of a few seconds. Was that even possible?

Pointing at where his leg was, I tilted my head, a questioning gaze directed at him. He winced as he saw the wound, hesitating for a while before saying, "You know what, fuck it, I'm gonna die soon. Might as well talk to a Titan in my last moments. One of your fucking buddies came and bit it off. Showed that little fucker not to mess with me though."

He smirked, probably remembering his revenge on the unfortunate Titan. He narrowed his eyes at me, asking, "How the hell do you understand me anyway?"

Shrug.

"Ok, nevermind. You're quite smart for a Titan. Are you a Deviant?"

Shrug and slight nod.

"You don't know? Fine. Err… do you have a name?"

At this moment, I paused. My name. I tried to recall it, but the memory was hazy, and each attempt to remember it sent a sharp jolt of pain through my head. Neither could I recall the identity of my friends and family. I heard voices. "Hey, come over here, _!" "_, you suck at baking!" "I love you, _."

My name was the one sound I couldn't hear. Was I forgetting them? No, some memories, like those related to Shingeki no Kyojin were still clear. I concluded that only memories related to this world and this life would remain as the rest faded away. I did not want that, refused to have the memories erased. But what could I do?

"Stop daydreaming, idiot!"

I looked down at the man, shocked at his outburst. He was glaring at me. Had I spaced out for too long?

"Do you have a fucking name?"

I shook my head.

"I'll give you one then, since you saved my life and all that shit."

Did I want to be named? I didn't have one now, and the idea of being nameless didn't sit well with me. A name gave one a purpose, defined one, set one apart from others. Most of all, a name was …special. I needed one, needed to know I was not just an unknown being in the sea of faces.

"How about Maria? Just like the wall," the man continued, unaware of my thoughts. Maria? I did not want to be named after the wall that would be destroyed, that was basically an invitation for karma to come and kick me in the tush.

Shake.

"Carla?"

Eren's mom? She died. Yeah, no.

Shake.

"Dora?"

Pardon my French, sir, but WHAT THE FUCK. Do I have a monkey next to me? Do I?

Deadpan look.

"Okay, okay, don't give me that look. How does Freya sound?"

'Lady'? I was never one. Goddess of War, Death, Love, and more? A bit extreme, was it not?

Slight shake.

"You're really picky, ya know?"

I flipped him off. 'Shouldn't you be dead from the blood loss now?' Oh, anime physics.

"Ah, got it! Libera, that's a good name!"

'Freedom', huh. How ironic, that I was a Titan, one of the creatures limiting humanity's freedom. I liked it. For some reason, it sounded right.

Nod.

"Libera it is!" He smiled at me. I was taken aback by the brightness of it. The light! It burns!

Then, he reached out to grab a finger, saying, "Heh, I bet you Titans are so dumb youcan't even speak. Try saying your name."

How arrogant! I tried it, "L-l-lib…b-be…ra…L-libera… Libera!"

The man patted my fingertip. "Yeah, that's your name. Freedom. Well, I-"

His body was racked by a series of coughs. Trembling, he extended a blood-covered hand, the red liquid running down the side of his chin. He was going to die. I had known it, but was so selfish, so afraid of being discovered and targeted, so cruel. So desperate to survive, to retain whatever freedom I had. I was so …human.

"Dammit, don't you go being such a sissy! My death ain't anything to worry about!" He must have seen the emotion in my eyes. He yelled, "Dumb fuck, I still haven't died yet! Stop fucking crying about it!"

Crying? So that's what the wet sensation on my face was. I lifted a hand and touched the substance running down my cheeks. Tears. He was right, I was a sissy. A selfish, cowardly, scared, desperate sissy.

"O-Oi, stop crying! I can't fucking deal with crying females! Stop leaking, goddammit! You act like a freakin' 2 year-old!" I looked back at him, wiping tears from my eyes. Leaking? That sounded like I was pissing my pants or on …that time of the month. Wait, I had nothing down there, so I no longer had periods? I had never thought of it like that.

Cue dramatic victory music.

I started laughing madly. Judging by the weird look he was giving me, I looked like I was insane. His coughing stopped my laughing fit. He was no longer sitting up, lying flat on my palm instead. He was silent, his chest barely rising and I could not tell whether he was still conscious.

Then, "What the hell? Where's that damn light people see when they die? All I can fucking see is your face!"

Yep, still conscious. I moved over to sit down under the tree, being careful not to jostle him too much. We sat under that tree, Titan and Human, until he died. I looked at him, guilt gnawing at me like a rabid fly on crack. What to do now? I couldn't leave his corpse outside the gate, or Titans would eat it. Night was rapidly falling, and even though Titans became slower and more lethargic, it did not mean they could not move. His last words had been,"Give my damn body a good disposal. If it becomes a fucking chew toy, I'll seriously come back to haunt your ass in the afterlife."

* * *

So, with no other choice, as a burial would be ineffective due to the fact that Titans had hands to dig him up with, I swallowed his corpse. Yeah, yeah, I should not have done it, but with a lack of choices, the best place to keep or hide something was with or on you. Even better, I could dispose of it within me. He could haunt my ass all he wanted.

I realised, as his body made its way down my throat and into the fiery pits of my digestive system, that I had never gotten his name.

And on a side note, humans didn't taste all that bad, if you excluded the fact that their clothing tasted like sweat and sometimes blood.

* * *

This chapter was a bit more serious and longer than I expected.

Please leave a review…

~Pride


	4. Birds and Karma

Omaiholimama. I am so sorry for the delay. The Wifi at my house was down and I could only read, review and reply from my phone with 3G. I had this typed up on computer and ready to go two days ago.

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin.**

* * *

Deep marks were gouged into the bark of a tree. One hundred and twenty-three of them, to be exact. Around four months had passed since my arrival in this world. In that span of time, I had seen enough horrors to last me a lifetime. I could safely say that horror movies would be like the Teletubbies to me. Okay, screw that. Teletubbies were highly disturbing anyway. Well, where was I? Right, the horrors. A group of Scouts were on an expedition. Seriously, it sounded like they were going camping or something.

It was a total massacre. Determined to go unnoticed, I could only watch helplessly as the people were devoured. Heads and limbs were ripped off with ease, bodies twisted in grotesque and unnatural ways. The most traumatising one was when a half-eaten woman was still desperately trying to crawl away with one arm. Her other arm ended right below her elbow, blood spilling out and pooling below the stump. There was a portion of her abdomen missing, the fluid gushing from the wound increasing the size of the pool of blood below her body. The Titan that injured her had most likely bit her on the side of her body, then carelessly throwing her aside. How wasteful!

Despite the fact that it would be impossible to survive with such injuries, the woman still pressed on, moving forward slowly. I witnessed her face contort in agony with each motion, yet she kept crawling. Her will and determination won me over. I stepped out from where I had been hiding, crouching down to her level. She glared at me with hatred, anger, determination, and a small hint of fear. Her lips twisted to form a smirk as the words left her mouth. "Go on…kill…me…I won't…live…any…way…"

The weight of her words hit me hard. She was asking- no, daring me to kill her and put her out of her misery. Should I? The fear, uncertainty and pity raged throughout my being. I was technically ending her pain, wasn't I? On the other hand, even if I had been indirectly killing people by remaining on the sidelines, I had never directly ended a human's life before. Scanning her body, I reached out, pinched her thin neck between my thumb and index and with a sharp twist, snapped it. It was quick and painless.

I felt nothing when she died. An empty, hollow feeling overcame me as my body grew weak and I leaned back against a tree to support myself. I gazed silently as the piece of flesh remaining trapped in my fingers lost its former warmth, becoming cold and lifeless. Black dots danced across my vision as the feeling of emptiness began to fill my limbs. The darkness was embracing my very soul, numbing it to all the pain, sadness and fear that I would usually have to face. Succumbing to the blissful blackness was so enticing, so hard to resist.

**'So give in. Give in to me, let me keep you here. Keep you safe.'**

_Safe?_

**'Yes, safe. The pain and sadness cannot reach you here.'**

_R-really?_

'**Mm-hm. Just let me take control.'**

_This is my body though._

**'That's not a problem, dear. Just succumb to me.'**

_WAIT-WHAT. WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST SAY?_

**'W-what?'**

_BITCH, I SUCCUMB TO NO ONE! THIS IS MY BODY, DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH IT!_

**'Oh, but this isn't just your body. It's mine too.'**

_What the fuck are you talking about?_

The voice, whoever or whatever it was, did not reply. So, all this time, I had been sharing a body with another soul? Who could see my inner thoughts, feelings and whatnot? And had just tried to make me join the dark side?

…where the heck were the cookies?

Of course, what if this body had never been meant for me? What if I had stolen it from its owner? I would be pissed as hell if some random bitch came in like, "This is my body now, so fuck off!" Being the vindictive little shit I was I would most likely try to murder her in her sleep.

Did I have an 'inner me'?

How was I to deal with this? To reach the 'inner mind' or whatever, one had to meditate or something. It worked in Naruto, with all the jinchuriki and bijuu stuff. So there I sat, among the corpses, meditating, of all things.

* * *

I was absolutely pathetic at this. I could not sit still and my mind would wander every thirty seconds. Losing the little amount of patience I had, I stormed off back into the forest. Shitty voice making me do this stupid meditation thing. Who needs it anyway? Yeah, I was being childish. Sue me.

After that little incident, no more voices spoke to me. I was nearly convinced that I had gone insane. For the rest of the time, I spent it learning how to speak again. It was hell.

"A-a-ap-p-p-p-p-ple…"

"B-b-b-ban-n-na-n-n-na…"

Yep, I had an incurable stutter that was so annoying, I was tempted to never speak again. Over time, my speech improved slightly, reducing my stuttering. It was still present though, and I figured that it was a permanent condition that I would just have to live with.

On the bright side, Titans could lose weight, albeit rather slowly. I noticed my beer belly actually shrinking a bit. Probably from all the running around I had been doing. Life as a Titan had become more familiar to me as each day passed. However, all good things had to come to an end at some point.

FIVE MONTHS LATER

There had been two expeditions this time, as the results had been just as tragic. One particular expedition had caught my eye. It was extremely familiar. The leader, the injuries, the faces. Where had I seen it?

Despite all the time that had passed, the memories related to Shingeki no Kyojin still remained clear as crystal, while the others had been deemed as unimportant and faded away against my will. I tried to recall if that group of Scouts had been shown in the manga or anime. It dawned on me. This was the expedition that had returned just hours before the Fall of Shiganshina and Wall Maria. Shit.

The Colossal Titan would kick a hole into Shiganshina for small titans to enter as the Armored Titan charged into Maria. Stay out or enter?

Curiousity was a dangerous quality in me that still had no qualms about slapping me upside the head and demanding I get my ass to wherever something interesting was happening. And like the mindless sheep I was, I obeyed and moved to the gate where the Scouting Legion had entered the Wall.

* * *

Waiting, waiting, waiting. As the sun slowly went down, I stomped over to a portion of the wall where some other Titans had been clawing and pounding against. A brief flash of lightning was all the warning I got before the Colossal Titan stood in front of me in all its 60-m tall butt-naked glory. I would have screamed or at least freaked out if it wasn't for the fact that ohmygodtheTitan'sgonnasteponme!

Scrambling backwards in a hurry, I stared, unable to look away, as the Colossal Titan clamped a hand on the wall, peering in on the tiny humans inside. It drew its foot back and swung it at the wall, demolishing the portion where his foot had made contact with the stone. It was not unlike how a toddler would kick down a sandcastle. Just one solid hit and everything would cave in. As quick as he had arrived, the Titan disappeared as the amount of steam increased. When it dispersed, nothing could be seen. It was as though the Titan had just been an illusion, a fragment of imagination, if not for the fact that a giant hole was now in the wall.

Step. A Titan had just entered the wall for what must have been the first time in a century. An unspoken signal had passed between the Titans, and they began streaming in. Screams rang out among the buildings as the people got their shit together and realised that, yes, the wall had been breached. The Titans were picking people up and devouring them at an alarming rate. Somehow, I had gotten caught up in the flood of bodies and swept into the district of Shiganshina.

The sheer panic and fear of the people amazed me. I realised, that although most people had acknowledged the existence of Titans, a part of them had still refused to believe that they were out there, outside the walls. Due to the unconscious denial, the fear upon seeing these creatures would freeze them and turn them into easy pickings for the Titans. The human mind was so complicated.

This had been my first time seeing so many people gathered in one place. Living in solitude for so long out there had probably made me some sort of hermit. It reminded me of home. The townspeople gathering each day,exchanging gossip, doing business, just plain interacting with one other. It was such a heartwarming thought.

Oh yeah, those happy townspeople were being devoured as I pranced in my little field of daydreams. I began striding over to a less inhabited part of the district. There were less Titans over there, the majority choosing to head for the centre of the district, where most of the people would have gathered at by now. I was almost at the outskirts of the district.

Witnessing a Titan pluck a screaming girl out of her room as her father shouted at it in, I dashed over, my speed having increased slightly from all the exercise I had been doing. Before the Titan could place the child's legs in its mouth, I had tackled it and ripped the body from its grasp. The child shrieked and struggled as I stood on the fallen Titan. The shrill cries were piercing my ears and getting on my nerves. I glared once at the child, sending her into quiet sniffles and sobs. Placing the girl gently next to her paling father, I extended a finger and nudged him into the open door as his daughter clung to him.

"S-s-sta-stay…f-f-fir-first…"

He got the gist of my words and wordlessly complied, entering the little house. The Titan I knocked over had left, probably not wanting to be in the same place as its rabid assaulter.

In the span of 10 minutes, I had collected 4 more people. I was unable to save the rest, and with each death I had seen a portion of me filled with guilt. I could not stop them, could not save them, could not do anything much.

**'Then why try?'**

_Oh, hell no! That crazy bitch's voice was back again._

'**I can hear you.'**

_Lady, I don't know who the heck you are, but listening in on my thougths is an invasion on my damn privacy. Considering the fact that I already walk around naked, I have very little privacy left that your ass shouldn't be in!_

'**Do you think I want to hear your thoughts? Everyday it's just guilt, guilt, sadness, insanity and then more guilt. It gets very boring and frustrating after a while, okay?'**

This voice was definitely bipolar. One moment she's taunting me, in another she's ranting at me. I have no idea who replaced her tampon with a rock, but I sure as hell am congratulating them.

**'I FUCKING HEARD THAT.'**

Ignoring her irritating voice—**'****The nerve of some people!'**— I headed back with the people. Cupping my hands to prevent anyone from falling off, I let them get comfortable before running. It took a while even for me, and I quickly deposited my passengers a distance away from the gate. They shot me looks of gratitude and minor confusion. I put a finger to my lips and motioned for them to come closer. Warily, they approached me.

"N-n-no t-tell."

A middle-aged woman stared at me seriously and said, "We won't," before turning around and explaining my request. The humans smiled at me and nodded. Ushering for them to leave, I smiled faintly as they neared the gate. Goodbye little people that I met for 15 minutes. Was this how birds would feel when the chicks left the nest?

Hold on. Was that— Shitshitshitshit! I froze in shock as a fucking Titan leapt out of nowhere and attacked them. Two had been squashed to pancakes when the Titan freaking trodded on them, one had been slammed in to a wall, and the others were tossed into its gaping black hole of filth, emptiness and despair, otherwise known as its mouth. Those birds must have been real depressed when the chicks flew straight at and collided with a branch.

Damn it, I hate birds now.

* * *

**Omake**

_Maybe, Just Maybe_

**PEOPLE'S POV**

The red-haired creature had rescued them from death. But, it was of the same species as their would-be killers. Could they trust it? Would it turn on them?

The first two it had saved, a girl and her father, had been petrified when faced with the first Titan. Rina and Caelum White. Red had filled their vision as another Titan tackled the one holding the child captive. Rina had been saved, only to realise that her death had only been delayed. The Titan had glared at her when she cried and struggled, the sheer intensity in those black orbs scaring the weaker being into submission. It came as a surprise when she had been returned to her Papa and told to stay in the house. Maybe not all Titans were as nasty as they had said.

The third, fourth and fifth survivors had been Claire, Mark and Jon Freed. A sister trying to escape with her younger siblings. They were so close to being Titan feed that the very sight of another one appearing had broken whatever fight they had left. No more escape, only pain and death. They almost wet themselves when the new Titan had punched the other two. They actually wet themselves when the Titan reached over to pick all three of them up. It had made a look of—was that disgust?—at that and tried to remove the vile liquid from its hands before picking them up and carrying them in one hand. Was it rescuing them? Maybe some Titans were actually nice.

The final person joining their little group was a woman named Mary Valen. A Titan had almost caught her when it had been pushed aside. Now, Mary knew more about Titans than the average person. This would have been classified as a Deviant, if the fact that she had not been eaten proved anything. Instead, the creature had plucked her body off the ground and placed her with the rest of the people it had gathered. How strange. Maybe the Titans actually had sympathy.

It had placed them a distance away from the gate. They looked at it, questioning why it had helped them. The Titan had waved them over instead. Warily, they came closer.

"N-n-no t-tell."

Mary understood immediately. Of course, a Titan like this would not want to be discovered. Explaining it to the rest, they agreed to the request.

Not long after leaving the Titan behind, they realised: Titans weren't that bad after all.

Right after that thought, Karma decided to be an evil bitch and pop in. They were instantly killed as a Titan attacked them.

'Maybe Titans are just that bad after all.'

* * *

I tried. Leave a review please?

~Pride


	5. I Got a Pet Cow?

I am very sorry for neglecting this. My updates will be inconsistent and I apologise for any inconvenience caused. :(

Yes! Over 50 reviews! Thanks to you guys:** FireLark, kenegi, Andreille Deflore, Anime Geek and Lover, FreeWeirdGal, I Luv Chickens, Ms Lilly, PenStride, Peter King, chickenrawr, mapleleafhero1, smileyface209, the florist, AoriRihito, BarleyRice, LadyKarma18, Sheik's Shadow, otakurose16, Shattermirror, IQvibe, Aesanna, Basilisk Heart, Lavender1088, crossoversfangirl1, Zyndium, d0nutl0ve, Kayzi, MagicMysticMojo, winddemon199, Anonymouse222, Azalie-Kauriu, Dreamer372, Eclipse130, Elisa1020, Fang of the Pouncing Jaguar, GiantTeddyBear, Ifiweretherain1, LMary52, Lavender1088, NLockheart, Nadeshiko291210, NighteFlakes, Oni-no-Karehana, Ruki Scarffy, Runriran, Saberguy, Shirohige no Musume, Supernatural Crossover Girl, What Doesn't Kill Ya, anomaly.1, legendary stvsrt, Alkoi, Gin no Kaze, Phoenician Rose, Plexi Pink, cma2002, The Holy Pineapple (awesome name), Cii- Chan and grim assassin sherlock**.

Sorry for the delay again.

**Disclaimer: Don't own Shingeki no Kyojin**

* * *

The Armored Titan was making its way to Wall Maria quite slowly, taking its own sweet time. I sat on a nearby house, attempting to balance on the shaky structure as it wobbled under my weight.

**'Your fat ass must be crushing it.'**

_Hey, you're a part of this body too, so you called yourself fat. And my ass is fucking beautiful, thank you very much. Way to make a girl self-conscious._

**'…bitch.'**

After that little conversation with the voice, which I called "Inner" (totally ripping off Sakura), the Armored Titan had finally decided to make his grand entrance. He made his way past me, and- whoa. Who knew that Armored Titan had such a fine derrière?

Damn, I'd so tap that.

He charged and burst through the wall like it was made of glass. Then again, glass could be insanely hard to break through sometimes. I could partially recall a nasty attempt to leap through a glass window that ended up with a dislocated shoulder and stitches on my forehead. Ouch.

The Armored Titan then proceeded to run out of Maria and disappear. Us normal Titans then walked towards the gaping hole and entered Maria. Just like the Shiganshina invasion, it took a while for the people to react. Surprisingly, the Titans had not harmed anyone yet. Anime physics, I suppose.

A pudgy little Titan was the first to pick a person up and kill the poor thing. I averted my eyes from the scene, moving deeper into the heart of Maria. Reaching a portion of seemingly untouched land, I was just about to walk into the cute little forest up ahead when the acrid scent of smoke reached my unlucky nose. Apparently, a Deviant had made it to the town before me.

Jogging towards the burning town, I was stopped by a noise.

"Miu…" A soft cry was emitted from the rubble of a fallen building. Could it be? My finger reached forward, carefully pushing the wood off. After removing the wood, something stumbled out. A …cow? How a cow managed to get trapped under a house, I would never know. It was a rather young cow, judging from its size.

**'You better not do what I think you're going to do!'**

I had always wanted a pet anyway…

**'No. Freaking. Way.'**

Obviously, I took the squirming cow with me as I headed to civilisation, or whatever was left of it. I gave it an awesome name. Maria Alejandro Paprika the Third, or Mary. It gave me shivers everytime I said it.

**'You're an idiot.'**

Disregarding the insults hurled at me, it was decided that Mary would be an important part of my lifestyle from now on. I loved drinking milk in my other life and being a 11-metre man-eating naked creature would not change that. Besides, Titans ignored animals, so Mary would be safe.

I cradled her in my hands and pet her head, like how one would do to a dog. Maybe I could teach her to fetch…

* * *

Leaving the already-reduced-to-nothing town with a cow in tow (hey that rhymed), I was surprised. I had quickly neared the district closest to Wall what I observed, it seemed that Wall Maria had become a miniature warzone. The Scouting Legion had arrived on their 3DMGs with swords all pointed at the Titans. They zipped through the air like flies on crack, cutting down the nearest Titans rapidly. However, the Titans were not inclined to idle and remain sitting ducks. With a quick bite, a Scout could easily be killed or immobilised by the Titan. After the Titans renewed their onslaught, it was clear that despite their superior reflexes and weapons, the Scouts could not keep holding the Titans back for long.

There were a few people that caught my attention though. A blonde man stood tall in the face of the Titans, barking out orders towards others. Erwin Smith? A brunette shot up from a roof, shrieking as he or she neared a Titan. The person allowed it to grab them, escaping at the last moment and swinging to the back of the Titan's neck before slicing forward. Definitely Hanji Zoe. Another tall blonde with eyes covered by his hair who appeared to be …sniffing the air. He took out a Titan that suddenly came from behind with a leap and a slash. Mike Zacharius, was it?

Holy shit on a stick, was that …Levi? And did he appear to be coming closer? Squinting slightly in the direction where a black blur was carving a path through Titans, I felt a chill run down my back. The slightly mad scientist also appeared to be heading in my general direction, followed by a few Scouts. I was literally standing right in their line of fire. Well, fuck me now.

Shitshitshitshit, gotta run. I was barely keeping the squealing fangirl in me at bay, who would have willingly thrown herself at Levi screaming, "NOTICE ME SEMPAI!". Looking around for a clear escape route, I clutched my baby Mary closer to my chest. Hanji was only 15 metres behind me and Levi was currently attacking a Titan a short distance away. Panicking for real this time, a rather unorthodox route revealed itself in time. Ah well, beggars couldn't be choosers.

I took a running leap over two houses before ducking as a Scout flew past right above me. Mary let out a loud moo in fear, gaining the attention of the one person I really feared now. One Hanji Zoe was currently pursuing me, yelling about how I was a Deviant that needed to be captured. Sure, her Titan obsession seemed rather funny when one read the manga or watched the anime, but in my current situation she was probably the scariest thing I had ever faced. Being experimented on was a definite no-no.

Inner's snide remark was not helping. **'Told you the damn animal was bad luck.'**

Levi had heard her shrieks and probably decided that a Deviant was a bigger threat compared to the normal ones, and thus needed to be killed ASAP. Either that or he just wanted to make Hanji sad. Anyway, he was literally breathing down my neck as I attempted to escape. I transferred Mary to my left hand before using my right to cover the back of my neck. I may have been slightly different from other Titans but our weak points were the same. Dying again and encountering that crazy woman up there would be such a bummer.

Hanji's shout reached my ears this time. "It's covering the neck! Definitely a special Titan! C'mon Levi, can we please capture it? I need to know what makes her so special! And is that a cow in her hands?"

Damn right I was special. Putting my ego aside, I dropped and rolled forward just as Levi used more gas and slashed at my neck. Crouching and leaping forward, I used my right hand to push on a roof to support myself as my legs went over the house. Thank God for learning parkour in my past life. Using these moves, I reached the hole in Maria with Mary surprisingly intact and only receiving seven slash wounds. Along with a handful of pee, courtesy of a terrified Mary. None of them hit my neck, thank goodness. If I could speak properly, I would have been running out of Maria with my arms above my head while cackling madly and screaming, "I'M FREE, BITCHES!"

It was a relief that the military had to stay within the walls and were unable to pursue me. As I hightailed my way out of Shiganshina, I was already dreading the events in the near future. And so, I decided to plan.

* * *

I tried. Leave a little review?

~Pride


	6. More Questions and Mad Cows

Yo, I'm still alive, haha. Aha. Ha. Ha…please don't attack me. So… I kinda promised to update last Saturday, but life hates me so a lot of stuff happened and I couldn't. I feel so terrible right now for taking so long.

Thanks for reviewing: **Ms Lilly, Mark-Kris Robin, Elisa1020, Zyndium, Atsirk Enoh, Ruki Scarffy, kenegi, bggirl, boomgoesthedynamite1479, SmileRen, otakurose16, nix, SucreTeen123, chickenrawr, SSS, crossoversfangirl1, Dreamer372, Annon, exaigon, Senpainoticedyou, BadWitchZara, Wonder-Potatoes, FluffyDragonsLiveInMyHouse, Opin88, TheTinyMouse, CPoPzzz, safranbrod, belelle, Shonlydreamsnow, Gibbles, ice devil cat demon, UntiedHeartbeat, Dark-Forest-Clouds, irene193, Harmonic Bunny, MunchyKool, TH3 51L3NT A55A551N, Fishy-Ninja, wolfstreak,11Creepypastas12, Sazzaneo, Sin of the Fallen** and of course, the **Guests**.

Special thanks to **Marrokk** for that awesome review. That really made my day and motivated me! ;)

Random fact: This chapter was written while listening to 'Hot Cocoa' by Kagamine Len. 56 times.

**Don't own Shingeki no Kyojin.**

* * *

It was a very calm and peaceful day. There was this relaxing vibe that most of us picked up on. By us, I meant the Titans, of course. I was just strolling around having my daily walk with Mary, planning the activities for the day. Inner had mercifully fallen silent today, and I appreciated the break from her sass.

This day was perfect. It was a day where I felt like I had all the time in the world, a day where I could just sit back and relax, a day where nothing could possibly go wrong. It was one of those days that I rarely got to experience. And I was sure to make full use of it. However, the universe always liked to pull the rug out from under me, rip it to shreds and cram the remains into a blender at high-speed. Unfortunately for me and all the other Titans within a two-kilometre radius, the Scouting Legion happened.

* * *

It was total chaos. Six Deviants had spotted them and began the chase. The worst part was that they were all coming from different directions. The Scouts had also somehow managed to attract a huge horde of normal Titans as well. The Scouts were heading to my current location, the forest which I resided in. I had kicked out most of the Titans from my land (because this was my territory now) and they seemed to have gotten the message, despite the occasional Titan popping in. That was when the humans were far away. With the presence of the Scouts, though, it was hell. The Titans looked like they had no intention of stopping and the Scouting Legion were only focused on getting to the trees. Well, shit.

I tucked Mary into a tree that I had hollowed out especially for her. She knew to stay there and remain till I returned. I headed off to the other end of the forest, where two Deviants were entering from. It was far enough from the Scouting Legion's current position, so I could have enough time to take care of those Deviants. I charged towards the pair, fist drawn back and ready to attack. I swung my arm forward, aiming for the throat of the nearest Titan. It collapsed onto the ground, but was slowly getting up as I settled into a ready position. I quickly turned on my foot and roundhouse-kicked the other Titan in the head. The force managed to knock the head off and it was sent flying. The Titan was most likely dead. I turned around to see the other Titan running towards me. Tensing up, I moved to the side and reached out just as it passed me. I grabbed onto the head and neck with one hand each and moved both limbs towards each other. The result was a bloody steaming fountain that spattered all over my upper torso. It may have been brutal, but it got the job done. 'Get off my damn lawn' was probably the only thing I could think.

The carcasses were moved aside and forgotten. I walked near the outskirts of the forest once again, intending to avoid the Scouting Legion as much as possible. My plan, however, was thwarted once again. A terrified moo echoed throughout the forest. Oh crap, Mary!

**'Hah, you unlucky bitch. Goes to show that everything hates you. Then again, who wouldn't?'**

_Oh, so now you choose to return?_

**'Why? Miss me?'**

_No, but I did miss the peace I had WITHOUT YOUR FREAKING COMMENTS._

**'Wow, angry much? Someone obviously needs to take a chill pill.'**

I snapped a little there.

_Bitch, do not fucking screw with me now or so help me I will kill you painfully and slowly. I am pissed right now._

**'Fine, fine, Miss I-really-need-anger-management-classes. Your threats are kind of useless, though. You technically can't kill me. So HA.'**

My anger dissipated as curiosity took hold.

_What do you mean?_

**'…'**

Inner had broke off the connection and refused to answer. It was frustrating, the way she dangled what could be vital information in front of me, just out of my reach. In cases like that, I usually just bit the hand that held whatever I wanted so they'd release it. Over here, I couldn't exactly do that, since it would just be me pulling an Eren and chomping on myself. I decided, for the sake of whatever sanity I had left, that it would be best for me to just ignore this incident for now and come back to it later. It was time to focus on the current problem. Now, where did I leave Mary again?

* * *

**Omake (because I feel that I should put in something extra to make up for this lateness)**

_POV: Mary_

She had been uneasy when the high-pitched noises reverberated through the air. Fear overwhelmed her when everything became dark and her body was immobilized. She was wary when the heavy weight on her back was lifted and a really big two-legs lifted her out. She was almost ready to die of fright when said two-legs began jumping and crashing all over the place while the small two-legs flew (they freaking flew!) behind with the pointy things aimed at them. She actually wet herself when the big two-legs almost crushed her flat. The odd pair had made it out of the two-legs' land alive.

The big two-legs had sat down by a giant tree and cupped her in its hands. It had pointed a paw to itself and grunted out, "Libera," before poking her in the ribs and saying, "Maria."

It had taken a while for her to understand that 'Maria' was her, and the two-legs was 'Libera'. She had to admit, 'Libera' was very different from the small two-legs. It had tried to make her roll over by pushing gently. Needless to say, Maria was not pleased. On four legs was how she stood now, and four legs would be how she always did. 'Stupid 'Libera',' she would think every time the giant failed.

Then, the 'Libera' had commanded her to "fetch!". It did not turn out well. Fetching was for the hounds that her old two-legs used to keep, not a prestigious cow like her. She had too much dignity and pride to even stoop to that behaviour. For even daring to ask, she urinated on the 'Libera's' paw. The 'Libera' had gotten annoyed and had climbed up a tree before placing her on a high branch. Pure terror had eclipsed the small rush of pride that had first run through her. Shock had then quickly replaced the crippling fear. As she was on the verge of a panic attack, she realised was shaking and trembling violently …with excitement. The light-headedness that had everything spinning, the insanely quick pounding of her heart, and the riskiness of the whole thing was, in her opinion, awesome. She would not deny the shivers that crept down her spine, and might have even secretly craved the thrill again. Yes, Maria Alejandro Paprika was an adrenaline junkie. Without even knowing what she had just been classified as, Mary leapt off the wood and dived towards the hard ground nose-first, mooing loudly. Everything went to hell after that.

"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"FUUUUUUUUU- " The 'Libera' was not happy. "GODDAMMIT, MARY."

* * *

This chapter might have been a bit shorter than usual. Sorry. Leave a review?

~Pride


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